Return
by TerraCotta Bones
Summary: Postmovie. Ed and Winry come to terms, even separated by gates that won't open. Implied edwin.


**Return**

**TerraCotta Bones**

**Disclaimer: **Death to litigation! The song is "Soldier" by Anna Nalick.

**Spoilers: **This entire fic is based off of HUGE spoilers – like, what happens at the end of the FMA movie.

**A/N: **This fic, for me, explains why I was crushed by the movie ending. Btw, even if you don't care about spoilers, it would be great if you watched the movie before reading this.

_He was a soldier_

_He always was_

_He left his city to fight for America_

_And we fell in love to music_

_We were just kids_

_We didn't have time to be sorry for what we did_

They all used to think he would come back someday. When he did, he left again as soon as he arrived, taking Al with him. After that, no one really expected him to return.

Winry hoped, but she didn't believe any more. She'd known he wasn't dead when he disappeared the first time – because she just knew – and this time, she knew he wasn't coming back. She just knew.

Mostly, she was able to move on; only small snippets of her drowned in the glory of sadness. She was comforted in her speculation that they would only leave for a good reason – they were fighting for something good, and pure, wherever they were – but even so, she was finally, ultimately, and completely alone now – her parents and her brothers were gone, and she'd never reach them again. She had other things to live for – automail, Den, Pinako, Resembol, herself – and that made it easier, but for the rest of her life her only regret would be that she was separated from them, the Elric brothers, and was never able to get them back.

Her only solace, as always, was her memories.

_And I said, "Hey, Boy_

_What you crying for?_

_It'll be okay in the end_

_And if this life doesn't give you the love you expect_

_There's always the next"_

When he crossed the Gate the last time, and found Al in the armor, and decided to look for that bomb, he was already beginning to give up. When he told Al that this was their world now, this Europe, it was the end. He'd never go back to Amestris – he never could. For once, determination failed him, and resignation took over.

He still missed everyone terribly, still lived halfway in a dream of Winry and Resembol and alchemy – just like Al, he thought – but it was easier because Al was there, and Al was really all he'd lived for since he was ten years old.

Besides, he had work to do and a life to live. He couldn't stop now because he'd left chunks of his heart in Amestris, in that moment when Winry hugged him like she thought he'd be back for good – he had to look for that bomb and destroy it, and try to protect this world like he'd tried to protect Amestris.

He was only a little outraged at his own righteousness, as it had taken him away from his real home to protect one he hardly knew.

_She was a pretty Texas girl_

_The answer to his prayers_

_He called me to tell me he'd fallen in love with her_

_She sang like an angel_

_Loved like a friend_

_She made my soldier believe he could live again_

It was many years after the Elric brothers disappeared before Winry really felt better. Her savior came in the form of a blonde engineer whom she met in Rush Valley – a blonde engineer with bright, honey-brown eyes and a sensitive heart wrapped around a sharp tongue. His name was Michael Rest, and he told her it was love at first sight for him. When he asked her about the pictures in her apartment, she told him that she kept her regrets and her sadness to herself – first for her parents, now for Ed and Al.

Besides, it wasn't love at first sight for her. He was like Ed and Al and automail all mixed up into one beautiful boy, and her heart screamed and her mind wailed and her body trembled when she figured it out.

But when she realized that, however hard she'd tried, half of her life was spent devoted to people in graves, or in heavens and other worlds, she let herself fall in love with the blonde engineer. He was kind and warm and strong, and he had broad shoulders like Ed. It was like living again, without living – loving this engineer.

_When she said, "Hey, Boy_

_What you crying for?_

_It'll be okay in the end_

_Oh_

_And if this life doesn't give you the love you expect_

_There's always the next"_

He was more surprised than anyone else when he discovered he liked her, Erin Beckley. He'd been attracted in the first place because she reminded him of Winry – long blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes, and muscled even in this anti-feminist world. She had an appalling knack for mechanics, although she didn't often express it because of her own belief in its masculinity and her rightful place sequestered in the homey sphere of stew and laundry and dress-buying.

Her two brothers worked with him and Al in the rocket business, and she and they were inseparable. Ed knew Al thought the same thing when they all met each other – _Winry. Wish you were here. We could be like this then. _

When she admitted that he was her favorite, beyond all others, he was startled. He was shocked that he was wrapped around her finger, like he'd been around Winry's – that he actually wanted to stay that way with her forever.

When he held her in his arms for the first time, it felt incredibly strange to throw all his being into embracing one person.

_Welcome back, _Winry had said.

He told Erin he was in love with her, and later he only felt he'd betrayed Winry a little – after all, he'd never been in love with her. Erin wasn't her replacement.

It was just that she could've been.

_So I'll be a gambler_

_And he'll be home free_

_He'll marry Texas_

_And I'll marry Melody_

Winry moved into the Rockbell house with her grandmother after she and Michael got married. Life bloomed in a way it never had before – the automail business went through the roof, carrying Michael's myriad of creations with it.

When she was twenty-seven she had her first child – well, children. Twin boys. Edward and Alphonse Rest. A year later she had a girl, Sara.

In her own way she was making up for her losses, paying her debt to happiness – or sadness.

Pinako stroked her hair as she laid in the hospital with Sara, and told her she was proud.

"Life ain't been good to you, girl," she said, "but you do a good job with it."

Winry believed her, mostly. Making lemonade out of lemons is no formula for happiness – better not to have the lemons at all. On the other hand, she had a flourishing business and a beautiful growing family, like she'd always wanted, so maybe it was time she give up sadness. Her life was good anyway, even if it was without her brothers and parents, and, some ten odd years later, her grandmother.

She was sure that, if they could, Ed and Al would have given her their blessing. That could be enough to last her the rest of her life.

_So love like my soldier_

_Fight for what's true_

_And smile at the gates 'cause that hate don't belong to you_

In the last years of his life, when his children and grandchildren, and even great-grandchildren, were grown and gone, when his wife was dead and Al seemed to be following him into death, Ed liked to remember, and speculate. In old age he'd lost a great deal of his hotheadedness, so looking back with clarity on his life was easier.

He wondered how Winry was doing, back in Amestris – did she ever become a famous mechanic? Did she marry and have children like he did? Was she happy? Did she miss him? Did she wonder where he'd gone?

Should he feel guilty about leaving her behind, even after so long?

When he had nothing left but memories and arthritis, his imagination drew great pictures of Resembol and his old friends and the life he left behind. He certainly didn't regret his life in Europe, America, Japan, but Amestris was his home.

When he died, all speculation about the nature of the Gate aside, he hoped his soul would return there and be turned into someone else's spirit. He was no evangelist of reincarnation, but maybe, somehow, his death would enable his return. He dreamed that, in his new life, even without his memories as Edward Elric, he would be able to find the people that Alphonse and Winry became, and be with them forever.

When he finally gave himself up to his deathbed, Alphonse followed him to hospital. They were both older than dirt, wrinkled as hell, and blithering idiots in ancient brotherly love. And just to pave the way for his little brother, Ed died first, his children and descendants weeping around him. Al passed away only minutes later, "Brother" on his lips.

Ed, in his last few seconds, thought of Al, the brother who had shaped his entire life, and his mother – he'd destroyed himself and his brother trying to get to her – but in the end it wasn't so bad. He thought of a beautiful, unreachable sixteen-year-old Winry with a wrench and a lavender jumpsuit, and all that she had put into his life, even when he was gone.

He missed her. He wondered if she could tell he was dying. He died.

_Hey, Boy_

_What you crying for?_

_It'll be okay in the end_

_And if this life doesn't give you the love you expect_

_There's always the next_

The Fullmetal Alchemist was a martyr for virtue in Amestris, even when Winry felt her life slowing down. Eventually, after too many interviews about her dearest friend, she wrote her own interview – a memoir of her life.

She was surprised at how much Ed and Al had influenced her life, even in absence. They were written into her automail and their footprints had padded her house, and in Resembol and Central their spirits lived on.

In her own way, she was reliving her life – how she'd always wanted to turn out like Pinako, how she never talked about her parents, how her two sons reminded her painfully of her two brothers. She was writing them all, literally, into her heart, so they would live there even when she was gone.

In her last chapter, she warned her readers not to let their lives be ruled by ghosts or haunted dreams – _but don't forget either. _She was confident that she was alive because of those brothers, because of all they had taken from her, and because of all the things they had wholeheartedly given back. She'd been their friend, mechanic, traveling companion, cook – she had her memories, though sometimes they seemed desperately insufficient, and now she was giving them to the Amestris that so desperately wanted to know who Edward and Alphonse Elric really were.

When she really did go, she was satisfied, mostly, with her life. She didn't regret being without her brothers so much, now that she knew there was more to life than them – or, more accurately, that life was more than them, and more powerful than their loss could destroy. She decided, as she told her daughter – who turned out to be quite the family historian – that she hadn't actually lived her life without them, because they were always with her.

Life was more powerful than their loss could destroy.

It moves forward, as Ed used to say. You have to move forward – she just had to choose to take them with her.

Maybe in the next life she'd meet them again.

_Whoa_

_Hey, Boy_

_What you crying for?_

_It will be okay in the end_

You can't get rid of sadness. You can't back your gambles with life – but their destinies were intertwined from the beginning. You can't cheat you way out of that.

Winry's great granddaughter was named in her honor. She lived in Resembol with her parents and Granny Sara, and her best friends lived down the road. They were two blonde brothers, and she was their surrogate sister.

She'd alchemized their hearts, and they'd wired themselves to her nerves. Even if it never turned out before, it was starting again now. Maybe this new crop of prodigies could make it work – and, for their own sakes, they would try. And just because, Heaven would shine her light on them. The part of their souls that were Rockbell and Elric, still and always, deserved it.

Their ancestors would be proud, and give their blessing, if they could.

It wasn't really their second chance for happiness, reincarnated as small children back in their childhood home, but you could look at it that way.

Winry and Ed and Al might, if they could.

_And if this life doesn't give you the love you expect_

_There's always the next_

_If this life doesn't give you the love you expect_

_There's always the next_

_There's always the next_


End file.
